Why I wrote this article:
Yesterday, I discussed with a student a meeting he had with someone else that did not go as planned. He had done a lot of preparation and was frustrated and upset by the outcome, ”no agreement to his proposal.” We discussed all aspects of the conversation and the resilience he planned to implement to overcome the resistance to change he was facing with the other person.
Just as I am helping this student to become resilient in his dealings with challenges, you, as a parent, can do the same with your teen.
Teaching resilience to them is essential because it equips them with the skills and mindset they need to navigate the many challenges they will face as they grow into adulthood. Resilience can help them to:
- Handle stress that comes with school, sports, relationships, and other pressures they may face.
- Bounce back from disappointments and setbacks, and learn from their mistakes.
- Persevere, maintain a positive outlook, and keep working towards their goals, even when things get tough.
- Develop a sense of self-awareness and self-confidence, which can help them make better decisions and feel more in control of their lives.
- Manage their emotions in a healthy way, which can improve relationships with family and friends.
- Prepare to handle the challenges they will face as they transition from high school to college or vocation and from there into adulthood.
Teaching resilience to your teen will help them develop the skills and mindset they need to lead fulfilling and successful lives.
What does resilience mean to a teen, and how does that differ from grit?
Resilience is the ability to handle stress, challenges, and setbacks in a healthy and adaptive way. It is an important quality that can help them navigate the many difficulties they may face during their adolescent years, such as academic pressure, social stress, peer pressure, and family conflicts. Resilience can help a teen maintain their well-being, build confidence, and develop a positive self-image. It equips them with skills and resources to overcome obstacles and pursue their goals. Encouraging and helping a teen develop resilience can positively impact their mental health, academic success, and overall life satisfaction.
Grit refers to a person’s perseverance and determination to work hard and achieve their long-term goals, even in the face of difficulty or setbacks. You can explain it to your teen by giving examples of when they showed grit (e.g., sticking with a difficult project or task despite setbacks) and when they demonstrated resilience (e.g., bouncing back from a disappointment or failure). Emphasize that both qualities are important for success in life and can be developed over time through practice and experience.
25 Actions Parents Can Take to Build Resilience in Their Teens
- Encourage independence and self-reliance.
- Teach problem-solving skills.
- Help them set and achieve goals.
- Encourage and support participation in extracurricular activities.
- Help them learn how to manage stress.
- Teach effective communication skills.
- Encourage them to take on challenges.
- Help them learn how to cope with failure and disappointment.
- Show them how to develop a growth mindset.
- Provide opportunities for them to learn from their mistakes.
- Help them learn how to manage their emotions.
- Encourage them to develop a sense of purpose.
- Help them learn how to set boundaries.
- Teach them to roll with the punches in the face of adversity.
- Encourage them to develop a support system.
- Help them learn how to practice self-care.
- Encourage them to be adaptable and flexible.
- Teach them how to be flexible in the face of change.
- Help them learn how to build and maintain healthy relationships.
- Encourage them to find meaning in their struggles.
- Help them learn how to practice gratitude.
- Teach them how to be strong in the face of uncertainty.
- Help them learn how to practice mindfulness.
- Encourage them to have a positive outlook.
- Help them learn how to practice optimism.
Having resilience can help your teen maintain their well-being, build confidence, and develop a positive self-image. Practicing the actions listed above will also equip them with the skills and resources they need to overcome obstacles and pursue their goals in high school, college, and as they progress through adulthood.